waiting in crime, it could be sin

It's 1:13 now when i've just start tickling my keyboard. Yes, now i can use my connection at home easier than ever, because my sisters decide to plug a wi-fi modem in our living room. Then i just need a laptop with wi fi, and mood buster to update this blog, my only place to sphread my every thaught.

Sometimes, i just misunderstood for some reasons like, what is my really blessed. drawing? taking photo? of course not singing, speaking? make others laugh? make friends? or just annoying others?

Truthfully, there's so many times that makes me feel like i'm the happiest person in the world with much friends surrounding me, laugh with me not laughing at me. But not infrequently that fun ends with so many bad feelings, even personal tears. Thinking of that fun just a moment ago, and that was plenty reasons that build a bad thought inside my personal mind, anything wrong with my brain? No i think, surely i can tell you, i'm a kind of sensitive people. Sensitives like i know when people don't like me, hate me, like me, adore me, or just a sycophant. So, i really know the time they feel uncomfortable with me around, maybe that is the point of my sadness, because i do not know the reasons, but they keep acting like i am really disturbing. I have a heart you know?

My friends usually treat me very well, then did something that hurt me, but they even do not realize that they already did. People?? Can you just try to see my feelings? I would not make you sad, just be good to me then i will do something better for you. Thanks to you friends.

I am not a kind like hating people just because they outer appearance, mostly if i have to hate somebody, it is because their own behavior. I personally do not like arrogant people in purpose. And i never want to think that i have to hate my friends, never ever! When i got hurt inside, usually nobody knows that. Why? Because since my birth until now, i haven't meet any body that suitable with my personality. Nobody. And i never find a person who can be a good listener with a good response to me. That is frustated you know? Even a page could not talks! (sorry to you dear blog)

Nowadays, Jatinangor and Jakarta are in the same level. This very time, they both do not makes me happy at all.

Tonight pray, Dear ALLAH, youre the GOD of everything in this world, i am just less than the smallest thing in this world in front of you GOD, but i know that you will always see me, bless me, and directing me to the exact path. Thankyou very much for everything You have done. Needs more than thankyou to makes equal, bu i know that i will never ever qan equal You, and i don't have any ability and i don'twant to. You are my only GOD, please keep my mama, papa, family, everyones in this world in safe and can enter the heaven directly (with your permissions and bless ofcourse). Thank You ALLAH, i will always love You ;'*

Now, since i do not want to continue my crime and make it became sin, i wanna get dressed in mukena then go for ISYA and Tarawih pray, bye everyone, keep healthy and pure